Monday, August 09, 2010

You Might Be a Yanqui If. . .

Over at the Seashells and Sunflower blog, my expat friend Katie listed clues that you might be a “Yanqui,” as we get called here by the natives. (By the way, don’t call us “gringos,” as here that refers to Italians.)

So here’s my own list. You might be a Yanqui ….

• If you consider a wedding dinner at 1 am to be a tad late

• You don't know what to do with the "bidet" (and totally soak yourself trying to figure it out)

• If you dare to dine alone in a good restaurant

• If you are surprised that it costs more to obey the law than break it (as in the $100 fee for renewing a visa, versus the $50 fine if you don't)

• If you imagine that customer service wants to fix your problem or that repair centers will have genuine parts

• If you think only affluent families have regular domestic help

• If you expect to pay US$100 to get a plumber or electrician to fix something, or if you think by paying extra they’ll come on a weekend

• If you expect to pay with a credit card and pay the same price as if in in cash

• If you say “please” or “thank you” instead of “bueno” when someone offers you a favor

• If you itch to "do something productive" after chatting with folks for two hours at lunch

• If you buy a fancy power mower instead of hiring a local gardener

• If you entertain the idea of attending or holding a garage sale

• If you think you can call your Senator or Representative for constituent service

• If you believe that everyone knows how to tango and/or ride a horse

• If you are surprised by the lack of “Spanish”  or colorful architecture

• If you expect to find stores open on Sundays (outside of grocers & shopping centers)

• If you thought that a postal service exists to deliver mail on time and pick up mail

• If you prefer chocolate to dulce de leche and brownies to alfajores

• If you long for PBJs and BLTs, Campbell’s soup, Kraft Mac & Cheese, etc.

• If you hear someone shout “Che” and expect to see a certain rebel

• If you send Christmas cards or keep a stash of wrapping paper & ribbons

• If you think traffic stop signs mean you should brake.

• If you think nothing of driving 5 miles out of your way to drop a friend somewhere

• If you wear baggy clothes or forego jewelry or make up (depending on your sex/tastes)

• If you eat your French fries or pizza with your fingers

• If you routinely wash your hands in a restaurant before eating (and expect to find soap and towels)

What tell-tale signs can you add? How well can you pass as a native Argentinian?


Katie said...

I loved your spin on the topic, Gayle! I have to say that I was a little wary of the bidet at first, but I've come to appreciate it. I'm never giving up on my taste for brownies though!

cachandochile said...

Gayle! This is GENIUS!! And pretty much every item on your list would be true in Chile as well (except for the tango part)!

cachandochile said...

Gayle! This is GENIUS!! And pretty much every item on your list would be true in Chile as well (except for the tango part)!

Mandi said...

I ain't Yanqui I guess! I always consider a wedding dinner late at 1 am. Of course, who would not? And dining in a good restaurant alone? Gosh, it will be so boring. And on those list, I sure am that I ain't Yanqui. But the list is hilarious! interesting it is to be a Yanqui considering that you have to be as what as the list is saying. Funny!

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I. M. Salos said...

This is terrific! Loved the format. Like Jeff Foxwothy's "Yew Maht Be Uh Redneck" routine. Thanks for something informative to read.